Normalize Dating Apps
design: Katie Huang
Leaving Tinder shaming in 2023.
by ZOE GREEN★ JANUARY 15, 2024
I have to admit it, I love Tinder. It’s like a video game– swiping my little heart out and receiving the amounts of male validation that I crave. However, I am terrified to open the app in public. It's like my little secret I keep in my app library instead of my homepage. If I see someone I matched with walking near me, I immediately find a detour, even if it is out of my way. If I tell someone about my obsession of the week, and mention that we met on Tinder, I always feel like there's a bit of judgment behind their reactions.
Over the past few years, dating apps have become more and more popular, especially in college settings. Whether it is just for a hookup, or you're searching for the love of your life, Tinder is like having a matchmaker in the palm of your hands. But with its increasing popularity comes an increased stigma behind using it...
We’re all afraid of a catfish, which is why this idea adds to the stigma. I was first introduced to this concept by the MTV show, and thought I would never be as stupid as some of these people. Sadly, I am a victim of Tinder catfishing myself. That could be used as an “I told you so” moment, but it never prevented me from trying again. There are ways to avoid getting catfished, like really talking to the person first. Snapchat is useful in that way as you send pictures. If they are sending black screens, or refusing to show their face, that is a red flag. If you are sure that you feel safe with this person, it never hurts to take calculated risks. This shouldn’t be what creates stigma around dating apps, as the chance of being catfished is unfortunately one you have to take, because who knows who you're going to meet!
Another big concern is safety. You are literally talking to strangers online. Talking to strangers online is one of the first no-no’s we learn, but the concept of Tinder goes against it. However, there are certain steps one can take to stay safe. Always meet in a public spot, make sure your friends have your location, you can create a code word if you feel unsafe. And if you're crazy like me, you can reverse search their phone number and find their criminal record-if they have one.
Meeting people is hard, and we are lucky we are living in a day and age where it has become more simplified. Dating should be fun– it's an opportunity to figure out what you want in life, and explore all the possibilities. If used safely, dating apps do just that. I think it's unfair to judge someone based on how they choose to meet new people. With so many new people at college, some may be afraid to go up to someone in person. Dating apps can help people get out there and make connections with others while eliminating the fear of rejection, because if you do match, it's mutual.
Looking down on others for their choices is so out. In 2024, we are leaving dating apps shaming in the past, and we are going to open our Tinder in public. We are going to wave at our matches in the library. We are going to proudly tell our friends that “yeah, I did meet him online.” We are going to be safe, and take calculated risks, and who knows, maybe you’ll find the one!