A Hot Girl’s Guide to Football
Football for the girls.
by KENDALL LUTHER ★ JANUARY 18, 2024
The National Football League’s demographic has completely transformed since Taylor Swift and Alix Earle began dating their “NFL men.” More and more girls are tuning in every Sunday to watch their favorite couples on and off the field.
In my family, Sunday has always been football day. After watching it every week since elementary school, I fell in love with the game and my favorite team: the Arizona Cardinals (I know, it’s been a rough season.) If you’re a new football fan, the games can often seem overwhelming and painfully long. That’s okay! There’s so much more fun to be had at game days and watch parties after the tailgate ends.
For new and old fans alike, I have compiled some tips and tricks to help the girlies get a better sense of the game and its intricacies. Here’s my expert guide to understanding American football — mansplaining-free!
The basics:
Teams play on a 100-yard field, which is marked by the big white numbers on each field, with two End Zones housing a field goal post for each team to score points through. Each team has players on offense, defense, and special teams.
Offensive positions include the quarterback, the center, the running back, wide receiver, tight ends, guards and tackles. The quarterback is undoubtedly the most important player on the offense; he is in charge of making plays and moving the ball down the field toward the End Zone. (Think: Tom Brady, Joe Burrow, etc.) You can tell when your team is on offense if the quarterback is on the field.
Defensive positions include the linebacker, defensive line, safety, and cornerback. The defense’s goal is to stop the opposing offense from scoring, and turn over the ball back to their team.
The kicker, punters, holders, and protectors are the key players on special teams. Special teams players are only on the field during kicking plays.
Each game is technically only 60 minutes long with 15-minute quarters and a 12-minute half-time break, although it often feels longer with time-outs, penalties, injuries, and 800 commercials.
How does it work?
A football game is broken into four key components: the coin toss, the kickoff, downs, and possessions. The team that wins the coin toss gets to decide whether or not they start on offense or defer until after half-time. Whichever team starts on offense will receive the ball from the other team’s kickoff.
Once the offense has the ball, their goal is to move the ball towards the End Zone and score. The offense has four downs (or attempts) at moving the ball 10 yards. The quarterback can run the ball himself, hand it off to the running back, or pass it to a receiver, tight end, or running back. If the offense successfully gains 10 yards, they receive a “first down” and have four more attempts to gain 10 more yards. If the team is not able to gain the yardage after their 3rd attempt, they send in their special team’s unit to punt the ball to the other team or “go for it.”
By punting the ball, the team is able to ensure that the ball stays as far away from the End Zone as possible, making it easier on their defense. If the team decides to “go for it,” they either get the first down, or the other team’s offense takes their spot on the field. The offense will continue its four attempts to gain 10 yards until they reach the Red Zone, where their only option is to score a touchdown (6 points) or a field goal (3 points). Then, the special team’s unit of the offensive team will kickoff the ball to the other team, and the cycle repeats.
However, the offense can lose the ball before they can score in two ways: an interception (a defensive player catches the ball intended for the offensive player) and a fumble (an offensive player drops the ball and the defense recovers it).
Scoring:
Touchdown: a player runs into the end zone with the ball or a player catches the ball while standing in the End Zone.
Extra Point or Two-Point Conversion: The scoring team can choose to kick a field goal for an extra point or run one more play for two points. Normally, teams choose to kick the field goal because it’s easier and more guaranteed to get a point.
Field Goal: If the offense is near the End Zone but too far away to score a touchdown on their fourth down attempt, they will often kick a field goal for three points. The kicker must kick the ball over the goal post and in between the two tall, vertical posts.
Safety: The defense can score a safety if they tackle — also known as sacking — the quarterback in the offense’s own End Zone. The defense would then earn two points.
Penalties:
When the refs blow their whistles and throw flags, it means one or both of the teams have made an oopsie, aka a penalty. Here are the two most common penalties – and most common reasons for booing from Otto’s Army and the student section.
False start: offensive or defensive player moves before the quarterback snaps the ball. This is a five-yard penalty.
Holding: An offensive player can get this penalty if he prevents a defensive player from tackling the ball carrier with a body part. This is a 10-yard penalty, moving the offense backward. A defensive player can get this penalty if he tackles or holds an offensive player who does not have the ball. This is a five-yard penalty that moves the offense forward and gives them a first down.
Helpful Lingo and Terms to Know:
Line of Scrimmage: Imaginary line (the yellow line on TV) from where the ball is placed at the end of the play. The offense and defense may not cross the line until the play starts.
Drive: The offense’s series of plays when they have the ball
Screen pass: A cute lil short pass from the quarterback to receivers on the sides
Hail Mary: A “last chance” shot at scoring; often used when there are seconds left in the second or fourth quarter. It is a longgg pass that makes fans and coaching staff say their own Hail Mary prayers.
The pocket: (Guys LOVE to throw around this term.) The pocket, or passing pocket, is the area where the offensive line is working to protect the quarterback from being tackled before he throws the ball. You may hear this in phrases like “He’s spent a lot of time in the pocket,” which means he had a lot of time to look on the field with the ball before throwing it.
Blitz: A defensive strategy when more defensive players than usual try to sack or pressure the quarterback before he gets rid of the ball.
Tight windows: When the quarterback throws the ball to a receiver who is super close to a defensive player, which is normally the cornerback.
You’re all set for the next big game! Grab your cutest game-day fit and go show off your new football knowledge.