The Importance of Finding The Right Place For You
I loved the 315 but could not stay.
by LYLA YOUNG ★ APRIL 11, 2023
It’s the day of high school graduation, and you are so sure of what the next four years have in store for the new chapter of your life. You had the decked-out bedspreads, you dangled a school-themed key chain, and you even decorated your graduation cap. All of this, only to actually get to college and be disillusioned. Or, maybe you are a year into college already and need a change of pace because it may not be the right fit after all. Regardless, you see that all roads lead to one conclusion, and it’s that you need to transfer. Sometimes, you don’t know where you want to be until you’re somewhere you know you don’t want to. But it will get better. You deserve to go to a college that feels like home. After spending a year at Syracuse, I, unfortunately, began to feel this way.
There is an overwhelming amount of stigma surrounding transferring colleges, especially at an institution with as much school spirit as Syracuse. I would smile, laugh, and my friends would embrace me as we belted ABBA lyrics at the top of our lungs at parties, yet even in such warm moments like this, something still felt amiss. Not even in my best of times could I not fathom that I was hiding how unhappy I actually was. I would wonder to myself, “how could I be surrounded by all these people I love and who appreciate me for who I am yet still feel stuck?” I heard the voice inside my head saying, ‘you just gotta give it more time,’ and kept being told that I mustn’t be so hasty since freshman year is hard for everyone. But when does it become clear that it’s school-specific issues that won’t resolve themselves with the pages of the calendar turning?
The overwhelming sense of relief I would feel when I went home for breaks doesn’t lie. About midway through winter break, I didn’t fight the feeling anymore because I believe everything happens for a reason. I then accepted the fact that for the sake of my own well-being, I needed to transfer. The very minute I came to that conclusion, all the stress went away. It’s also completely normal to move in silence, in fact, I often encourage it. I only told my roommate and best friend prematurely because I didn’t want to have a living agreement in place, when come mid-August, I’ll be on the other side of the country.
Transferring also doesn’t make you a failure, it’s about finding what’s best for you, and if that means leaving Syracuse, so be it. I thought through the ‘what ifs?’, but that unattainability proved that I know I’ll be happier somewhere else. When you’re at a college that’s the right fit for you, and you don’t need to question everything nor let the question ‘what if?’ haunt you, then you’ll know. I love my friends and my extracurriculars, but I still wanted to leave, as I feel it’s my destiny to use these next 3 years to go on a new adventure and leave the Northeast. But despite transferring, I don’t regret coming here in the slightest.