Real Talk on Being a Hopeless Romantic Who’s Emotionally Unavailable
Not confusing at all, right?
by GIA TUMMINELLO ★ OCTOBER 5, 2021
“I really like you and want you in my life but, I just don’t want to be in a relationship right now… but we can hangout all the time, talk everyday, and act like we’re dating. DEFINITELY don’t call me your girlfriend, though.” If this sounds like you, keep reading.
Love is scary and amazing at the same time. More often than not, the possibility of heartbreak is what prevents us from exploring and experiencing the ups and downs of love. It’s about time we fix that.
If you’re emotionally unavailable, you’ve probably had your heart broken before. It can feel like the worst thing on Earth, and chances are you’re going to go through a tough breakup at least once in your life. That’s the truth. It's time to start taking each relationship or ~situationship~ as a learning experience. Get a sense of what you like in a partner. Real talk, if I didn’t get my heart broken, I would definitely not be the stronger version of myself that I am today. There were definitely red flags that I ignored because I settled for comfortability, but by forcing myself to move forward, I realize now that settling for less is not sustainable for future relationships. If a guy wasn’t going to treat me the way I deserved to be treated, another guy would. So, even though it seems scary, heartbreak has its perks.
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Let's talk about how the person you’re pushing away might be *the one*. If you push everyone away, how will you know if something could work out? If you like someone, just go for it. It’s 2021. You deserve to be treated like a queen because you are one. If you and this person have chemistry, it’s time to stop second-guessing whether or not you want a relationship. You don’t want to look back on your life and have regrets. If it does not work out, at least you can say you tried.
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Perfection doesn’t exist, so don’t let it cloud your judgment. It’s easy to create this image in our head of the perfect man that would be straight out of a movie. A movie is a movie for a reason. They are filled with characters who read scripts and are told what to do. In real life, there are no scripts. You are never going to find a person that does everything right, has every physical feature you want them to have, or even the personality that causes you two to click. Start living in the present, because the right person could be staring you in the face and you wouldn’t even know it.
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Stop putting so much pressure on relationships! Learn to see the beauty in imperfections and take risks. No relationship is going to be perfect, but you will learn something from every single one. It’s easy to be so in love with the idea of love that you scare yourself away from it. You have to start learning to be okay with the possibility of heartbreak and stop pushing people away. And, honestly, you’ll never know unless you try!
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