The Guide To LGBTQ+ Allyship
10 ways to be an effective supporter of the LGBTQ+ community.
by DESJAH ALTVATER ★ JUNE 22, 2020
On June 2, 2000, former President Bill Clinton declared June "Gay & Lesbian Pride Month" to commemorate the June 1969 Stonewall Riots. Since this groundbreaking announcement, the LGBTQ+ community has experienced a series of historic advances in equality. Still, the world is nowhere near where it should be in regards to LGBTQ+ rights. While 2020 has been a critical year for humanity, it also marks the 20th anniversary of Pride Month, a beautiful nod towards a community that cannot be defined.
The LGBTQ+ community is one that faces continuous scrutiny and discrimination across various sectors of life. If you do not identify as a member of the community, the most important contribution you can make is to simply be a supportive ally. For the LGBTQ+ community, an ally is defined as: a heterosexual and cisgender person who supports equal civil rights, gender equality, and LGBTQ+ social movements, challenging homophobia, biphobia, and transphobia. Contrary to popular belief, there is not a cookie-cutter method of allyship, but being an effective one requires education, advocacy, action, and a desire to learn from your mistakes.
Here’s how to implement allyship into your lifestyle:
Listen:
There are countless people who just need a shoulder to lean on and an affirmation that they are enough. When engaged in a conversation, always state that the person shouldn’t feel pressured to answer or share anything they’re not comfortable with. Also, make sure you’re in an appropriate and safe setting to talk about potentially heavy or triggering memories.
Unlearn historical messaging:
Before you can be an LGBTQ+ ally, you must identify, unpack, and challenge stereotypes and unconscious bias. It starts with knowing a little history. If you want to gain knowledge, click here.
Recognize your privilege and use it for good:
That said, recognizing your advantages can lead to feelings of discomfort, anger, shame, or guilt. Try not to dwell on those feelings and instead channel that energy in a positive way by advocating for change.
Don't assume that all your friends and co-workers are straight:
Someone close to you, whether it be friends, family, or associates, could be looking for support in their coming-out process. Not making assumptions will give them the space they need.
Learn and use correct and inclusive language:
It is important to use the right words and pronouns when referring to someone or describing their gender identity or sexual orientation. Never assume someone’s gender identity or sexual orientation. Ask if you’re unsure and if it’s appropriate.
Confront your own prejudices and biases, even if it is uncomfortable to do so:
Not everybody is knowledgeable in regards to the LGBTQ+ community and that is okay. However, it is not okay to promote discriminatory behavior or language. Make sure that you are actively doing the work to positively change your perception of the community and those within. Everyone deserves acceptance. Get comfortable with being uncomfortable!
Defend your LGBTQ+ friends against discrimination:
Unfortunately, the world we live in is not as accepting as we like to pretend it is. As a result, there are still people, companies, and laws that operate in opposition of equality. When faced with such situations, always act in favor of justice and don’t tolerate anti-LGBTQ+ jokes or statements expressed in your presence.
Make a supportive gesture:
When available, contribute small acts of kindness. This can include accompanying a loved one to their first Pride parade or displaying a rainbow flag. Actions speak louder than words and the little things carry more weight than you realize.
Do not make Pride Month about you:
Yes, a supportive friend is wonderful, but know your boundaries as an outsider. Observe, listen and take part without promoting how good of an ally you are or without making LGBTQ+ people feel like they're exotic creatures. They’re still human.
Believe that all people, regardless of gender identity and sexual orientation, should be treated with dignity and respect:
Enough said.
Sexual orientation should not be a device to categorize individuals but a lens that gives insight into one’s relationship with the world. Similar to a smile, allyship does not cost anything and should be exuded regularly, not just for one month. Love is a basic human right, regardless of who you share it with, and deserves to be celebrated year-round.
Please consider donating to the following GoFundMe Campaigns:
Central Florida LGBTQ+ Relief Fund
House Homeless Trans Folks For Protection From COVID-19
Please utilize and share the resources below:
Support for LGBTQ Individuals and Families
Essential Resources for LGBTQ+ Teens and College Students