The Unofficial Guide to Growing Your Friend Group
Making new friends is a necessary evil.
by JENNY DESTEFANO ★ AUGUST 16, 2021
POV: Your parents dropped you off on campus and you stand alone in your newly-moved-into room. Do new friends just like, appear? Or is there a sign-up sheet somewhere?? If you were maybe a little too silent in the FaceBook group this summer, or don’t know anybody besides your roomie in your sophomore dorm (thanks, housing lottery <3), it’s time to find some more besties. Below are a few tips to help you get back in the friend-making game...because ugh, how do I talk to new people again?
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Tip #1: Dorming? Leave Your Door Open
When it comes to the first week of school--in the words of Bruno Mars--“leave the door oooopen.”This way, you’re inviting people to pop their heads in and introduce themselves without having to feel awkward knocking on doors like a Girl Scout to say hi. Leaving your door propped open for those first few days when you don’t know anyone in your dorm can really help you get to know the people on your floor, which TOTALLY comes in handy the next time you need to borrow something from your neighbor.
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Tip #2: Reach Out To New People Regularly
I know, I know. If you’re anything like me, you HATE making the first move when it comes to plans (cuz duh, I’m like, the best, you should be asking me). Still, you’ve got to ditch the mindset that your attempts at friend-making will come off as amateur stalking-- Think of how eagerly you’d accept coffee plans with someone as cool as you. At the end of the day, no one worthy of your time is going to full-on reject a new bestie. I promise, everyone is always in the market for friends-- so feel free to snap a classmate or mutual friend to join you on your daily Dunkin’ run.
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Tip #3: Join Clubs
It may seem obvious, but joining clubs and organizations is SUCH a fab way to meet a ton of new people at once. If you’re joining a club, it’s probably because you’re interested in whatever they do -- And so is everybody else. Guaranteed that you’ll share commonalities with your new peers, clubs are also *perf* for networking and making connections with like-minded people who can help you out with classes and even career goals. Similarly, consider going Greek to find gal pals who fit your vibe, and don’t discount business frats! #Panhel-love <3.
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Tip #4: Say “Yes” To New Plans
Last but def not least, practice saying “yes” more frequently. I often found myself turning down a lot of Bird study dates or lunch on the quad because I was literally just too lazy to branch out-- but whenever I did, I thought, “Why don’t I do this more often?” Of course, you don’t have to get carried away and push yourself to go out EVERY night if that’s not you. A girls’ night in--complete with popcorn and “The Bachelor” obvi-- is always a great option to spend quality time with friends if you’re too tired to dance on an elevated surface. Saying “yes” simply means making the active decision to not brush off opportunities to meet new people-- You never know you’ll click with.
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In the end, don’t worry if you find yourself hopping around a lot with plans instead of sticking to one group...you WILL find your people. Stay true to you and welcome new friends wherever you find them.